I am doing Project Life 365...you can check out my photos at www.scrappygirlsdailylife.blogspot.com!

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Sometimes You Feel Like A Nut...Sometimes You Don't!

Don't forget to weigh in today! I am taking a leave of abscence from weighing because I have been "absent" from my world for at least half of this week. I did not deal well with having to go on medication for my thyroid (today is day 2 of taking my pills). I am not a medicine taker...I hate taking anything. I have made peace with it (for now).

My trip to my parents' home for Mother's Day was hard. It was hard to only get to see them for 15 hours and then come home. I miss Lil Sis so much I can't type this sentence without tearing up. My grandparents have quit living and only talk about death and sickness..I came home and had a "melt down."

I miss my parents...I miss my sis...I miss my grandparents...I miss my side of the family...I miss BFF Ruth...I miss getting to go to events regularly for my family.

Then when I came home I pulled into our driveway...I found every flaw possible...I looked for them...I found a problem and I took it on myself...I found everything that needed to be done and became obsessed with how it was never going to get done because I couldn't do anything about it.

I scared my mom....I worried my husband...I hurt Manga Dork's feelings...I was ugly and I was going to wallow in it. How did my inlaws react? They somehow decided it was all about them and gave me guilt trips about "not liking them"..."not wanting them here"..."not feeling like they are important"..."not asking SIL to go to AI concert." Boy...that was not helpful at all. I became numb and retreated inside myself.

I was selfish...and now I am over it. Time to move on...

"Most people are only as happy as they make up their minds to be." --Abraham Lincoln
"When you reach the end of your rope...tie a knot and hang on."--Abraham Lincoln

6 comments:

Jan said...

Sorry you had to melt down. Maybe it burned some calories though, right. Trying to look on the brightside :)

CB said...

I just hate those meltdown days! Please know you are not alone - everyone has them sometimes - don't beat yourself up...just move on! You are great!!

tammy said...

I'm sorry. Everyone has meltdown days. It's allowed. Sorry the in-laws made it worse.

Love both of those quotes.

Still weighing myself. Each and every morning.

kado! said...

at least you have some family nearby...even if they are in-laws....we live on the opposite coast from all of our family...they all live in WA state in the same town and they forget about us all the time. they never call and rarely e-mail...I started my blog for them to keep in touch....I have only received 3 comments from the in-laws...and that has been since January...I cry about it all the time. A couple of my sister in laws even forget to call my son on his birthday....that stings the worst. They don't understand what it is like to be all alone in a completely different state while they are able to just drop off their kids at any family members house and go to dinner with their husbands....babysitters are hard to come by! AGH...sorry...but I feel your pain...and it is a subject that I try daily to not let bother me....some days it does NOT work! =)

The Blonde Duck said...

We all have meltdowns. Don't beat yourself up. I hope you feel better!

Jen said...

I know how you feel Scrappy doo! I had a moment of self wallowing Sunday, but then I decided it was better to look at what went well instead of what went wrong. It's amazing how things get so much better when we look at the glass half full instead of half empty. Glad you are doing better.