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Monday, February 21, 2011

Teen Fun And Teen Not-So-Fun

My favorite high school senior arrived Friday afternoon. I was so excited to spend the long weekend with her here. We hopped in the Escalade {that is still not the same after the accident} and headed into town. We ate at Applebees...shopped at the mall and TJMaxx...and watched "Just Go With It." Btw...that movie is the best I have seen in a while...funny and romantic. Jenn Aniston and Adam Sandler are great together.

On Saturday I went to my first thirty-one party {fabric personalized purses, lunch totes, totes, etc}. Then we went to the grocery store. We ended the day with a pizza party and a Just Dance 2 Dance Off. Fun!
On Sunday we joined Dr. Hubby on a shopping trip at Cabelas. We entertained ourselves the best way we knew how. Fun photo time! We ended the day with a Game Night {from hades} at my inlaws. My 2 little ones were monsters and no one seemed to want to stay focused on the games. FAIL.

IMPORTANT TEEN PARENTING QUESTION!
Manga Dork is 15. She has a boyfriend. I have offered to take her, her boyfriend, and another couple on a "date." They can walk the mall and see a movie by themselves. This must be with me or Dr. Hubby chaperoning.
He can even come to our home for a couple hours, but they have to stay in a "public room." NO bedrooms. She is not allowed to go to her boyfriend's house. She is not allowed to go to a friend's house with her boyfriend or other boys.
She is very unhappy with these rules {which I take to mean I am getting it right}. She cried cause she wants to go on the "date" with another parent chaperoning. The same parent I saw this weekend who told me she was tired of running around town and that even though her daughter's boyfriend is not allowed to go to her house to hang out she was on her way home and "what his mom didn't know wouldn't hurt her" and "if he gets caught it is on him not her!"
So my question is...
What are the teen dating rules in your home?
or what will they be when your kid becomes a teen?

11 comments:

Kerry McKibbins said...

First of all, looks like you had a great day and secondly, I want to hear about that bag party. I never heard of them.

Now on to the dating rules:
DS is 14. He's had 2 girlfriends. 1st was my bosses' daughter! The mom and I are great friends. We would drop them off at a movie but hang around in town in case they needed us. I took them to a Bway show and lunch, the three of us. It wasn't all that weird because I knew the girlfriend very well.
The second girlfriend, we talked with the parents, made sure we knew where they were going. Big rule: if you don't answer my text, I will call. If you don't answer my call, you're in big trouble! I say, stick to your guns. Sounds like you're doing the right thing.

Kristina P. said...

Our church has some suggested guidelines of allowing your kids to date at age 16. I like that rule.

Cherie said...

We don't let our kids date until they are 16 and then we highly encourage group dating until at least their senior year of high school.
It has worked out very well.

The kids have alot more fun with the group dating and we know all the kids and have them in our home often so we know who they are.

We also do not let our kids date the same person twice in a row. For instance if our daughter wants to go out with Mark on Friday night and then again on Saturday night she better have a date with Bob Saturday during the day. No dates twice in a row. This encourages them to date lots of people and to not get so friendly (if you know what I mean!).

We also have strict rules - No boys in the bedrooms or vice versa, strict curfews, etc...

Garden of Egan said...

I think 15 is young.
Your rules are good.

I had to say to my kids many times, I am sorry that I have to be a parent and not your friend to let you do everything YOU want.
I was a pretty strict parent.

She really doesn't want to be serious with one guy anyway.

Guys are like fishing.....catch and release!

tammy said...

I think you are one smart mama. Gotta trust your instincts. The longer I can keep my kids from dating, the happier I'll be. Age 16 is the rule around here, and then only group dating until they're 18, like Cherie. And then I plan to secretly follow them around everywhere.

I'm kidding.

Maybe.

Cynthia said...

I'm not there yet but I certainly live in fear- my twins will be 11 this summer so it's creeping up on me.

M-Cat said...

Gosh, the dating rules. Our boys weren't allowed to date until they were 16. Then we encouraged them to double or group date. We went so far as to make a deal with them. If they would date a different girl each date (no same girl back to back) we would help financially with the dating. If they got a girlfriend, they were on their own. We would not finance a girlfriend. I know having girls is different so I feel a little out of my league with any kind of rules, but 15 is young and they should be chaperoned, and the fact that she is mad about it, IS a good sign and a sign that you should stick to your guns.
Too many parent try to be the cool parents, and be their friends. Your kids have plenty of friends, they need PARENTS.

hang in there and good luck!

gigi said...

I could not date until I was 16 and when I finally turned 16, No one asked me out. Finally around 17I had my first real date. I did lots of group dating and that is so much more fun. Now my boys, we did the same thing. No dating until 16 but neither dated any one girl until they were almost ready to graduate high school. They also hung out with lots of kids and did the group dating stuff. They were more nervous when it came to one on one.

Protect her all you can no matter how hard she cries! She needs you to be the parent and you are doing a great job!

gigi said...

And that was 17 and not 171 :(

The Blonde Duck said...

I think you've got great rules!

Creative Mish said...

The rules in my house was 16 and it was group dating until Senior year. Friends could come visit as long as we were home and they were out with the family socializing. Occasionally I would let them go study or watch Tv along but we always had the open door rule. They all knew and understood the rules from the beginning and that is just how it was.. I had the same rules growing up.