I am doing Project Life 365...you can check out my photos at www.scrappygirlsdailylife.blogspot.com!

Thursday, January 22, 2009

I Have the Blues...

*I have the blues...I mean the huge big ol' pity party kind of blues. Honestly I feel like I don't have anyone here where I live. My family is all 4 hours away and I am stuck on this farm with inlaws that lie and talk about me behind my back. My MIL and FIL are traveling to their other home and will miss Cutie's bday, but will be back for my niece's. I feel so insignificant. I struggle with the Mrs. Dr. Hubby thing or "That's doc's wife." I used to have a name. The 2 little ones are so sweet but they are exhausting! Manga Dork is a total teen and I am not used to being "the enemy." I hate cleaning! I am so sick of it. I hate dieting...I have been sneaking snacks and can't seem to get back on track. I feel so fat and ugly. How unimportant do I feel when my hubby comes home and talks about all the great doctory things he did and then he looks at me and I say..."I made a card today" or "I mopped the kitchen." Who am I kidding...the floor still needs mopped...lol! I need a tissue...

*I reserve the right to delete all these thoughts if they turn out to be PMS induced.

18 comments:

Bobbi Jo said...

You are important to many people. I am sorry you are feeling so down and blue. Sending you a HUGE hug!! Praying you feel UP very soon. Hugs, Bobbi Jo

mommablogsalot said...

::hugs:: Oh have I been there - I really feel for you, these days are the worst. I wish I had any advice but all I can really say is I hear you.

Dana and Daisy said...

I'm sorry you're having a bad day. I wish I could say just the right thing. Does this help: " At least your MIL won't be there to ruin the b-day party! "

I wish you did not feel like the outsider. I feel that way sometimes, too. In this thing called a blended family I live in everyone else is blood related but me. I feel like they are all slushy smoothie and I am like a big pit of a prune that accidentally got thrown in the blender!

But we can get through all this! And just because you admitted it, I admit I have been awol on my diet the last couple of days too. So, you are not alone!

Cherie said...

Hi I am a friend of Sondra's (Clean Frugal Living) and so I have been reading your blog for awhile because well, we have some stuff in common - Twilight for one - haha.

Anywho I decided to comment today because I call this feeling you have "FEBRUARY".
It is not quite February yet but the February feeling has already rolled into my life too! haha
It is that wintery, blah, yucky feeling that makes you question life, yourself and everything in between...February - it stinks! ha ha

So just know that you are a MOM and that is the greatest and the hardest job in the world and it also seems to be the one that gets the least amount of credit. Your bloggy friends are here for you though! We understand.
So just know today that you are awesome!

::Jan:: said...

Man that PMS. I just want to get rid of it. I will run as President of the US on the platform of nonstop medical research on the conquering of PMS around the world. Maybe that is where Peace on Earth Lies Scrappy. Are you in as Vice Pres?

richies said...

Mom's are the backbone of the country. You are not insignificant.

An Arkie's Musings

whoopsadasie said...

Scrappy...you are so loved here in blog land. We are behind you all the way and feel your pain! Just know you are not alone! (((hugs)))

Shanda said...

This too shall pass. Always remember that. I feel isolated sometiumes too because my family is 5 hrs away and I don't get to visit often. The blues are so normal for winter and I suffer every year with it. I was so down about 2 weeks ago. Just know you are fine and an important factor in your family. It's just the blues making it all seem so weighty and heavy hearted today. They will go away soon. Remember our lives are like mountains with valleys and peeks and we like the flowers, grow in the valleys.
Hugs to you nmy friend,
Shanda

McEwens said...

Scrappy, these years when the kids are young.. are SO hard. Hard cause what you do, needs to get done again the next day. BUT you know what, as a mom of older kids, IT IS WORTH IT. Hang in there.... YOU ARE important! You are teaching these girls to be great moms! JUST LIKE YOU

da Bergs said...

I am NOT laughing at you, I am laughing with you!!! I totally remember those days!!! IT does get easier... and you are a GREAT mom!!!! If you dont believe me... go back and look at all the fun times you have had with your girls! What great memories!!!

coreymom40 said...

Hun, hang in there. You mean so much to everyone. I'm kinda sitting here tonight feeling sad about my friend that passed. He was so young......
I put up some music for him on myspace....Pms'ing is part of it.......but still.

Sondra said...

I feel your pain.. Seriously - it must be in the air. I am getting totally depressed myself. We haven't had sun for sooooo long now. I am about ready to head to the tanning beds and get some rays - in hopes of getting out of this funk.

Isn't is nice to know you have so many blogging friends who love you and are there for you to lift your spirits? I hope after all of these great comments - you are a wee bit happier. Life sucks sometimes, but we can get through these winter blues together. {{{{Hugs}}}} I think you are an awesome, talented, lovable, great friend. I feel very bless to know you!

Marilyn said...

I am so sorry you are feeling down today! I can totally relate to how you are feeling. It will pass, and you will feel better. I wish I could do something to help you. Just know that I think of you often and wish I could be there with you! Think on this....Twilight comes out on DVD in March!!!

Wendy said...

(((Scrapppy))) Sorry you got the winter blues! My sister swears by Vitamin D...you know because of the lack of sun exposure. I wish there was a cure for PMS...You got my vote Jan...lol!

As a Navy Wife for the last almost 20 years there are some things I would suggest. First, that you take more time for yourself. Even if it's just 10 minutes before the rest of the house wakes. Go on date night's with the hubby...it's so important to feel like a woman who is wanted for something other than laundry...lol! Also, you need a support system closer to you. Because we move every 2-4 years the friends that we make become our family. Therefore, make play dates for the kids so you can meet other moms. Volunteer with your favorite group or organization.

And your diet...just pick yourself up and start again. No beating yourself up...it's hard and we all fall down. You can do it...we believe in you!

Lawanda said...

Its ok Scrappy!!! We all have moments like that!! Being a MOM is the most significant job there is!! Even when the house is a mess, you've snuck a few snacks, the teen acts like she hates you (this one is the hardest, I am dealing with it too!), the babies are all goin nuts... Even when you have days like this, you are still the single most important person in that house, chicka!!! :)

Although you won't see the results of handling a bad day with grace for several years, you eventually will, I promise ;)

Cynthia said...

I feel you on the feeling insignificant thing. Lately I've had the feeling like I'm not living up to my potential. That I could have somehow been 'more'.

It's the paradox all women face. If I'd retained my career and schleeped the kids off to daycare I'd be second guessing myself too.

You are not 'less than' him because you have made his achievements possible. However, maybe it's time for you to start thinking about long term goals. The thing that is motivating me to stick (at least somewhat) with the weight loss thing is that I have a big goal I'd like to achieve and I need to be less-fat (but not skinny) to get there. It's okay to think of yourself as a separate entity from your kids and husband in some ways.

However, it's also hard to do that because it requires us to do things we think we can't and to accept the possibility of failure for ourselves. It's easier to just throw everything into our families than to face our fears. I know, I've been doing it. But not anymore. Dare to dream of what YOU can become aside from everything you 'do'.

Marchelle said...

Girlfriend! I'm so sorry I missed this post yesterday. I would have totally given you all kinds of love and good vibes, except I was too busy wallowing in myself and how grouchy I was!! LOL

Don't feel that way though...you are doing the hardest, most underpaid job known to anyone = SAHM = and it appears that you are doing it WELL!

Glad you're feeling better today!

CJ, the Purple Diva said...

Oh Scrappy! You are so loved by so many people-well, maybe not MIL, FIL, and SIL, but I mean, the rest of us-we all love you! Forget about them! You are one awesome mom and lady! It's okay to feel blue once in a while...hugs sweetie! Sorry I'm so late to sending you some love! ♥